Valerian Puskar died Sunday. He was 85. He had about as good a death as anyone could ask for, spending a snowy day by the fire, hanging with his family, listening to music. He went to sleep and woke up dead. Bonus for him: He got to join the love of his life, Emily Hamilton Puskar, who predeceased him.
Valerian was born August 13, 1936, in what was then Czechoslovakia. The youngest of seven, he lived in eventful times. The summer he spent on a farm in the country, evacuated because of World War II, was formative. He had a German shepherd dog named Buffi, he played the cello, and enjoyed all sports. After graduating from the University of Bratislava with an engineering degree, he taught at the University of Prague, where he first developed a longstanding love of Chinese food. Prague moo shu notwithstanding, he chafed under Soviet rule and in 1964 escaped to Vienna with his sister and her husband and children. Valerian then went to Essen, West Germany, and after considering Australia, South Africa, and Canada, decided to emigrate to America, specifically New York City, where there is lots of Chinese food, though none, he would later remind his family, as good as that restaurant in Prague.
Valerian moved to Yorkville, where he had a fifth-floor walk-up with a tub in the kitchen. The neighborhood had been a center of the Mitteleuropa diaspora and, lucky for him, was right next to the swish Upper East Side, where the Junior League ran an English language class. Happily enrolled, he was surprised to turn up to class midway through the term and find a brand new teacher, also called Miss Hamiliton. The original instructor had quit to get married and, not wanting to confuse the foreigners, the Junior League was able to find a replacement with the same name. As anyone who spoke to him can attest, the second Miss Hamilton was not an excellent teacher of English, but he was smitten. In short order Valerian and Emily wed.
They settled in Greenwich, had two children, and Valerian commuted to Manhattan, worked as an electrical engineer, and enjoyed all the hallmarks of a mid-to-late 20th century life, filtered, of course, through his charming and slightly wacky world view. He loved his family and friends, and had lots of both. He was especially pleased to reconnect in the ’90s with his large and wonderful family, whom he’d been compelled to leave so many years before. He was a devoted member of Christ Church, and lived his faith completely. He was terribly cheap yet deeply generous. In spite of a late-life affinity for Fox News, he was kind to all and a notoriously soft touch. He cried easily and always had a hanky. He had perfect pitch and could whistle symphonies. He was a dog-loving man. He wore ascots unironically. He hated particle board.
Valerian leaves behind son Michael, daughter in law Lucy von Brachel, daughter Katherine, and son in law Eric Barrow, all of Greenwich; four grandchildren, Helen and Edward Puskar, and Brooke and Kay Barrow; a sister, Eka Krcmery, of Slovakia; numerous nieces and nephews, as well as friends all over the world.
Burial is private, but there will be a celebration of life at his home on Easter Sunday, April 17, 2022. In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to Christ Church Greenwich or the Junior League of Greenwich.