At St. Mary Parish in Stamford there is a new pastor, Father Juan Gabriel Acosta, who started on Aug 1 and is already anticipating the upcoming 4th Lourdes Retreat with Bishop Frank Caggiano on September 14 at 2:00pm.
Greenwich native David D’Andrea, who is coordinating the fourth Lourdes Retreat in Stamford on Sept 14, 2205, with Erin Neil LCSW who is Victim Assistance Coordinator for the Bridgeport Diocese, and Father Juan Gabriel Acosta, Pastor of Saint Mary Parish in Stamford. Aug 13, 2025 Photo: Leslie Yager
The popular event, coordinated by Greenwich native David D’Andrea, was attended by 1,100 people last year despite a rainy forecast.
Lourdes retreats typically focus on the theme of healing, drawing inspiration from the Sanctuary of Our Lady of Lourdes, a site known for miraculous healings and pilgrimages.
But wounds take various shapes.
Mr. D’Andrea who was a victim of sexual abuse as a child at St. Roch’s Church in Greenwich, said it was important for everyone to know they are welcome to attend the Lourdes Retreat.
“You don’t have to be Catholic, abused or sick,” he said. “Many people are moved by the experience, and while some people come forward with their stories, others might not.”
Meeting Survivors Where They Are
Victim Assistance Coordinator for the Diocese, Erin Neil LCSW, who leads the Safe Environment programs, said her group is inclusive and meets both in person and sometimes via Zoom.
“We have met in libraries, churches, in college spaces – places that are non-threatening because not everyone can come to a church. We’re meeting people where they’re at, giving them many options to be comfortable.”
Ms Neil said that last year some survivors came forward at the Lourdes event and others reached out afterward. And she said, some people who participated in her group are ready now to participate in the outreach.
“Part of their healing is to tell their stories openly,” she said. “So many survivors felt that really helped them to take the next step in their healing.”
“We want to encourage anyone to attend and know there are others who will walk with them on their journey to healing,” she said. “There are counselors who will be there on the day to speak with them and an opportunity to meet with our survivor group if they’ve been abused or wounded by someone from the church or anyone in their lives. The one thing people take away from this day is to know they always have a place to go and a chance to speak with people who have gone through this. We are working with our Bishop to protect children and reach out to survivors.”
Father Acosta at St. Mary Church in Stamford
Father Acosta: Doctor, Priest, Lawyer
Father Acosta, who hails from Bogata, Colombia, has an interesting background: He speaks three languages and in addition to being a priest, a doctor and a lawyer.
Having spent 10 years in medical school and trained become a Cardiologist, he made a choice to leave the field of medicine and join the Diocese.
“I always wanted to be a priest but when I finished secondary school in Colombia I was 16 and was too young, so I knew I would have to wait,” he said. “I love medicine too.”
Father Acosta’s accomplishments are impressive, especially given his age: 42.
After practicing medicine briefly he entered the Diocese, starting at Mount St. Mary’s in Emmitsburg, Maryland. He was ordained in 2013 and assigned Parochial Vicar (Associate Priest) in Assumption Church in Westport, before becoming a Pastor based at St. Ladislaus in Norwalk.
Father Acosta became Rector St. Augustine in Bridgeport, and after two years there, he was asked by Bishop Caggiano to go to Rome to study Canon law, which he completed in June, after three years.
“Then I became Pastor here in Stamford, as well as Judicial Vicar in Bridgeport,” he said.
“I learn something every day. It’s a beautiful place. People are so nice here – so welcoming and warm,” he said of the Saint Mary of Stamford Parish.
Father Acosta said his medical training had been put to use. He was the official medical doctor in Rome and at Mt. St. Mary’s in Maryland.
Today, he said, he values his pastoral work.
“This is a great opportunity to come back to parish life. I love to be surrounded by people,” he said.
Acosta said he was looking forward to welcoming people to the Lourdes Retreat on Sept 14.
Bishop Frank Caggiano and David D’Andrea at the Lourdes Retreat, Sept 7, 2024 Photo: Leslie Yager
“I know how important it is, how much effort people have put in and how meaningful it is. It’s a way to reconcile people to God and welcome everyone,” he said. “I’m grateful because I see in David (D’Andrea) a person willing to help others and move forward, people with wounds from the past.”
“Even though there are some wounds in the past, we’re able to move forward,” Acosta added. “You’re never alone, there’s always people around and people who have experienced difficulties in the past and are able to rise from this and move forward.”
“This is what the church is about. We don’t stay in the past. There is light and we move forward. That’s my philosophy. I’m so grateful to David and everyone who put effort into this.”
St. Mary Church in Stamford is undergoing a three-year renovation. Aug 13, 2025. Photo: Leslie Yager
D’Andrea said it was at a meeting of about a dozen people at St. Roch’s Church when he first told Father Arthur Mollenhauer about the rapes he suffered there as a child. He recalled the silence that followed and Father Arthur clearing the room.
Later, he said he participated in a survivor group event in Danbury where he spoke during a reception.
“Erin was there too,” he recalled, referring to Ms Neil. “An elderly lady tapped me on the shoulder and said ‘You convinced me to come forward.’ I pointed her to Erin or the Bishop. I told her, ‘I really want you to go. I’m not saying I’m healed, but I’m dealing.'”
Mr. D’Andrea who is passionate about the Lourdes event said despite his ordeals he has had several miracles.
“I survived Polio. I personally survived sex abuse by a pastor. And I survived both cancer and heart surgery,” he said. “I’m happy to be alive and do something for other people. There’s something about this event, and this is my fourth one with Bishop Caggiano. The Bishop makes it so inspiring.”
D’Andrea said he was impressed Bishop Caggiano was taking on the issue of sexual abuse.
“He just went after it and said we’re not hiding anything and we’re going to take care of people who have been hurt,” he said. “He listened to me 2-1/2 hours and he said, ‘On behalf of this diocese, I apologize and we will take care of you as best as we can.'”
Like D’Andrea, Father Acosta said the Lourdes Retreat would be all about healing and emphasized that all are welcome regardless of their religion.
“Damage is not just done to Catholics. You don’t need to be Catholic, just be here, and be moved,” he said.
Ms Neil said outside the Lourdes Retreat, people should feel welcome to contact here any time at 203 650-3265 to learn about the group for survivors.
“You don’t even need to give your name,” she said. “You could call for someone else.”
She said for their first step, many survivors are not ready to walk into a church, instead preferring their first meeting to be in a small group.
The Lourdes Retreat is Sunday, Sept 14 at St. Mary Church, 566 Elm Street in Stamford at 2:00pm.
The event will include courageous testimony from survivors of abuse including Mr. D’Andrea, as well as the rosary and benediction from Bishop Caggiano. Father Acosta will summarize testimony in Spanish.
The event is expected to run about an hour and 10 minutes. Parking is abundant on site.
The original Wardwell Italianate villa was moved and today is beautifully restored adjacent to St. Mary Church. Photo: Leslie Yager Aug 19, 2024