By Mary Lee Kiernan, YWCA Greenwich President & CEO and Jessie DiMuzio, Director of YWCA Greenwich’s Harmony Project
The purple ribbons on first responder vehicles, all over social media and on YWCA Greenwich staff and others in the community are important reminders that October was domestic violence awareness and prevention month across the country.
Domestic violence occurs when one partner in a relationship gradually establishes power and control over the other through intimidation, manipulation, threats, or coercion.
And while most people think only of physical abuse when they consider domestic violence, it’s important to note that abuse includes emotional, sexual, verbal, physical, digital, legal, and very often financial abuse.
Although largely overlooked in the dialogue about domestic violence, financial abuse is universal in the experiences of survivors and is estimated by the National Network to End Domestic Violence to occur in 99% of abusive relationships. According to the National Network to End Domestic Violence, financial abuse is behavior “that seeks to control a person’s ability to acquire, use or maintain economic resources, and threatens their self-sufficiency and financial autonomy.”
The NNEDV also reports that financial abuse occurs across all socio-economic, educational, racial and ethnic groups. Yet, according to the NNEDV and the Allstate Foundation, 78% of Americans still have not heard of financial abuse as a dimension of domestic violence.
The Connecticut Coalition Against Domestic Violence provides additional descriptions of financial abuse, which include:
• Forbidding one’s partner to work or attend school
• Sabotaging employment opportunities by causing a visible injury prior to an important meeting
• Jeopardizing employment by stalking or harassing their partner at work
• Denying access to a vehicle or damaging the vehicle so that they cannot get to work
• Sabotaging educational opportunities by destroying class assignments or books
• Withholding money or giving “an allowance”
• Not allowing their partner access to bank accounts
• Hiding family assets
• Running up debt in their partner’s name
The long-term impact of financial abuse can be devastating to a victim and a victim’s children. McKinsey & Co. estimates that violence against women costs about $4.9 billion in the United States annually.
Seventy percent of this comes from direct medical costs, 15% from lost productivity, and 15% from lost earnings over women’s lifetimes. According to the NNEDV, 75% of victims stay with their abusers longer for economic reasons, among others, and many who return to their abusers cite an inability to address their finances.
Teenagers are not immune to financial abuse. During their teenage years, many youth are exploring romantic relationships, developing more personal and financial independence, and are vulnerable to financial manipulation. What does teen financial abuse look like?
According to Futures Without Violence, financial abuse among teens falls into three broad categories: economic sabotage; financial control; and financial exploitation.
Economic sabotage means interference with someone’s ability to go to school or work, such as pressuring a partner to take the same classes; take time away from studying; skip classes or drop out of school; quit an activity or demand that the partner participate in the same activity; or pressure to change post-graduation plans.
Economic sabotage also involves teen interference with work, which can look like pressure to not have a job when the partner wants to work or, conversely, get a job when the partner did not want to work; pressure to not show up at work or always be available via text or cell while working; pressure to change or quit a job; or convincing a partner to work at the same place of employment.
Teen financial control includes preventing a dating partner from using resources and financial exploitation describes using or manipulating a dating partner’s resources. For example, abusive partners may pressure another to hold onto or manage their money; buy items they don’t want or give them money; pay for all or most of their dates; tell the partner what to spend money on; loan money when the partner can’t pay them back; or force sharing of bank account or credit card information.
65% of teens surveyed by Futures Without Violence cited some form of financial interference and 29% of teens delayed ending a relationship because of the potential impact on school, work or access to financial resources. 34% of teens surveyed felt pressured to pay their partner back with physical or sexual contact. 42% experienced the exploitation of a partner holding something gifted or provided, such as money, a gift or transportation, against the abused teen.
These early experiences have lasting impacts on future healthy relationships, education and employment.
Prevention work, particularly with youth, is critical to halting the cycle of relationship violence and financial abuse that begins in the teen years and without intervention carries into adult relationships. YWCA Greenwich is proud to partner with our local public and independent schools, employers, non-profit organizations and the larger community, to educate on both healthy and unhealthy relationships, as well as mitigate risk factors that we see among those who are already experiencing abuse.
If you or anyone you know has experienced domestic and/or sexual violence of any kind, including financial abuse, please call our 24-7 YWCA Greenwich Harmony Project Hotline at (203) 622-0003.